None of us are immune from any unpleasant life events that could cripple our emotional, physical and mental wellbeing. Having said that, some of us are equipped with an internal tool to cope with such unpleasant events that called resiliency. And others need to understand self and equip themselves with such tool for coping with unpleasant events of their lives.  And perhaps all of us need to reflect on our lives to understand more about self and needed cop-mechanism in case of sudden and unpleasant events dramatically unfolds in our lives. It is important to know, understanding of our emotional disturbance is the first steps to recognize needing professional help. It is true that we can understand our difficulties and it is true that we mostly will need professional help in a deeper level that could makes us to go back to our functional lives. However, information given in this article might help us to recognize possible needs for getting help.

This short article is all about how to evaluate and understand ourselves to know in which category we have difficulty to function. We might also assume all these categories are relating to each other which is true, yet, getting rid of one conflict will help us to deal with few others easily and profoundly.  We have built a foundation for understanding of our difficulties categorically, internally and systematically within core of ourselves. Well at this point I like to mention few points that will help us to get glimpse of categories that I was talking about those. The most and an important element is being aware of self, it’s boundaries and directions. This will bring us to regulating, learning and attention to the needed information internal and externally that is enabling us to form skills for required tasks, multiple way of doing things and most importantly learning from our experience. Now the point comes to communication by the self and others. This will enable us to understand, communicate in a variety levels such as verbal and nonverbal, being able to understand our lives in a symbolic way, reflecting in our lives and understanding of our social and personal interaction. We also need to recognize and identify our differentiation by being able to distinguish circumstances of the self from fantasy and reality, past and future and present moment. I most often work with imagination and I believe imagination is the way of understanding behaviour, desire, needs, wants, goals, beliefs and in general it is image of our mental state that I consider. We most often talk about self-esteem and level and quality of it. This is helping us to develop sense of control in which must not be out of reality and not be viewed unrealistically either. The matter of impulses that we all experience internally time to time would reflect externally that the self must be able to control and regulate according to appropriate behaviour and adopted with social norms. Self regulation in this matter is the key point. Defense mechanism of us depends on our ability to express and cope. Therefore, inappropriate cope or defense mechanisms will allow us to wrongly replace our impulses with defense mechanism. That is when we find ourselves in trouble. We also have the ability to adopt with any new environment accordingly and when this adaptation abilities and skills do not exist, then the self will be lost in confusion by not being able to define self, self’s properties and its boundaries. I realize that the above points are not giving the complete picture of our self evaluation yet; these points are basic, short and important that would help us to understand and reflect in our lives. Just going through above matters even in the surface of it, will give us an idea how we are dealing with ourselves and possible emotional disturbance in our lives journey.

Gestalt Ottawa

Site: www.gestaltottawa.com

e-mail: gestalt@gestaltottawa.com

Phone: 613-260-2604

383 Parkdale ave

Ottawa Suite 105